“What’s your biggest regret in life so far?”
“If you could go back and have a re-do of anything in your past, what would it be?”
“What’s that one thing you want to change about yourself?”
Questions of this sought are the ones thrown at us, maybe at times, or maybe quite often. Sometimes it’s just us asking ourselves this question and nobody else. To answer that question, we start going back in time, taking a brisk walk down the memory-lane of our life so far and recollect all things gone wrong and re-live all that pain a little. And we have a LOT of things to answer that question with. A relationship gone wrong or that one choice you made between your parents and your job. Or that trip you took back in college that you could’ve just avoided. Oh, we sure do have a lot of things to regret, don’t we?
“If only I chose this and not that“, “I should have just said YES to him. And maybe my life would’ve been really different now“, and thoughts of this kind start flooding our mind. But what if someone told us that we really don’t have to regret anything in life? What if all those questions like the ones enlisted above don’t have to have an answer at all?
Yes! Why do we need to have regrets? Now you may ask how that’s possible because as humans, we all have surely committed a lot of mistake and that it’s natural to hold regrets for it.
But hey, if not for all those mistakes you committed, you wouldn’t have gotten here. Your mistakes make you. Because intentionally or unintentionally, you do recognize your mistakes and analyze why you did it or what you’re doing it for. And until and unless we have this trait of probing what went wrong and why it did, maybe there’s no reason why you need to linger on to that bad memory or choice.
Let’s say there’s something you have really wanted to do for so long but you know it’s something that’s not completely right. So you never did it. On the other hand, let’s say you went for it but aren’t really happy with the outcome of having done that. Now think about it. Maybe the latter is better than the former for a happening. At least you’ve now got better stories to tell your grandchildren!
Everything you have been so far and everything you have tried for, irrespective of whether you succeeded in it or not, has surely earned you an experience of a life-time. And maybe that small mistake you made is the reason you’re better off now.
Why do we always have to compare our current state of emotional and physical living with a hypothetical situation of how things ‘could be‘ and wished it were the other way around? Maybe what you are now, is the best of who you can be. And of course, when there’s always scope to be better. What’s it that we really have to worry about?
So, let go of all those “regrets” you think are your regrets. You really need not have any regrets at all. Moreover, your choices and decisions you made in the past have been the basis of how much you’ve grown as a person today. Everything of your past is only either a way to feel proud about how far you’ve come or to reassure yourself that no matter what choices you make in the future, you believe they’re only going to do you good.
No regrets. No apologies. Just hope. And pride.
Article By- VethaVarshini Kavya Allam